Answered Prayers

Even though my mom had said she was willing to look at the final horse, when we got to the barn, her attitude said otherwise. The minute she saw Eclipse, she said, “I don’t like him. He is just a barn horse, probably used for plowing or something.”

“Mom,” I said, in utter disappointment, “You haven’t even given him a chance… he may surprise you.”

I could tell she hadn’t even really looked at him, because he was, in fact, a stunning, sleek, black gelding with the purest white crescent in the middle of his forehead, the defining marking for which he had been named. He stood sturdy and strong with near perfect confirmation.  

  “Fine, but I am telling you right now,” she grumbled, “He is not the appaloosa. I think we are wasting our time.”

Shock and embarrassment hit me at my mom’s attitude. This was not her usual kind and gentle nature, and I was confused. It was as if she had blinders on and could only see the outside beauty of the appaloosa, without even trying to look into the beautiful soul of Eclipse and all he had to offer. Of course, it was 105 degrees that hot August day, and she was exhausted from countless hours of driving across the state to look at horses. Even so, that was no excuse for her to act so rudely or to be so unaccepting of the exquisite horse in front of her. I think in some odd way that God was using that moment to show my mom that what you see on the outside is not nearly as important as what lies within, but at that moment, nothing mattered to her but the appaloosa.

 Putting her demeaning opinions to the side, Dayna and I watched intently as the trainer rode him around the arena, showing us every gait. He moved with pure beauty and grace, perfectly, slowly, and steadily with each stride he took. Yes, it is true, I had seen a lot of horses and fallen in love with just about every one (I love all animals and would love to take them all home), but something about Eclipse was different. His calming nature was like nothing I had ever seen; so many of the previous horses I had visited were apprehensive about my walker and would immediately shy away from it, the rattling noise and squeaky wheels catching them off guard. Eclipse, on the other hand, never even batted an eye from the first moment I walked into his presence.  In fact, he seemed to be rather fond of the shiny, silver contraption, running his teeth across the handle grips and licking it, as if to say “Hey this is pretty cool, and it tastes great too!”

After the trainer spent about 45 minutes taking him through the audition, Dayna and I both had the chance to ride him. From the moment I sat on him and took the first lap around the fence, I knew he was my boy. My body was perfectly in tune to his rhythm, as if I had been riding him for years. I felt safe and secure, and as we trotted around the arena, the true definition of balance and stability was revealed.  Riding him was a feeling like no other. A sense of complete peace entered me, and I felt it was God’s presence whispering softly in my ear, “This is the blessing I’ve been saving for you.”

 He was exactly what we had been looking for; there was no comparison between Eclipse and the appaloosa.  Dayna and I looked at each other and said, “This is it.”

“Dayna,” I said, with slight fear in my voice, “I am really scared to tell mom this is my horse. She is dead set on the appaloosa. This might break her heart, but I know he’s the answer to my prayers.”

“Don’t worry,” she said, “I’ll help you tell her.”

I knew how much my mom valued Dayna’s opinion, and if she felt like this was the right horse, then mom would too. Dayna had been our guiding light throughout the process, telling us “No” on several prospects that we thought would work. She was meticulous and thorough about finding the perfect match; she knew this was not a decision I could just rush into. She kept telling me along the way that the right horse was out there, but that I just had to be patient until we found him. I trusted Dayna’s judgment more than anyone, and I knew that when she finally said “Yes,” that would be the horse that was meant for me. 

  “Mom,” I said, with a worried look in my eye and excitement in my heart, “I have to tell you something. I have made my decision; Dayna thinks it’s the right one.  I know with every beat of my heart that Eclipse and I are meant to be together. Please don’t be mad.”

“Honey,” she said, shamefully, “All that matters to me is that you’re safe and happy. Yes, I did love the appaloosa, but I know I will love Eclipse even more.”

I took a deep breath and hugged her tight.

That summer day changed my life. The Lord blessed me with the most incredible gift, and I will be eternally grateful for my beautiful Eclipse. He has brought so much joy into my life and filled the deep void in my heart in more ways than one. God used him to help me understand that the challenges life brings are always used for good for those that trust and rely on God’s guidance.  Through Eclipse, I have been taught to appreciate everything life has to offer: the highs and lows, the struggles and the successes.  He is so much more than just a horse; he is an angel sent to show me how to love myself and be proud of the person God made me to be.  I believe that God sent him to me for a purpose and to carry me through this journey. I understand now that my disability is not a punishment; I was simply not made to walk alone. I just needed to wait for my partner, my other half, my companion who would help me along the journey and carry me along the way. It took twenty four years to understand that I can walk, that I am walking, and with something far better than two legs. I am walking by the grace of God, for I am walking with hooves.